If you’re newly divorced and just diving into the world of online dating, it’s easy got get overwhelmed. Setting up a profile, meeting new people, carrying on a conversation, and trying not to bring up the hardships that got you to this spot. Online dating is a whole new world, and depending on how long you were married for— it might be entirely unfamiliar. So we’re gonna break it down for you. The do’s, and the don’ts, and everything in between.
Online Dating Advice for the Newly Divorced
The Don’ts
Don’t talk about your ex. I could say this three times over and some of you still might, but let me explain why you shouldn’t do that. It was an unpleasant time in your life, probably one of your lowest, and thinking about it, dwelling on it, puts you in a bad headspace and will likely run off whoever you’re talking to. If they’re reaching out, they have an interest in you. Bringing up your ex and the sordid love story isn’t doing any good for you or your potential date.
Don’t expect that your first date will be your last. Your goal should not be to dive right back into something serious. You’ve gone through quite an ordeal. Keeping it light and breezy will be better for you in the long run, as I’m sure your emotions are still a little out of wack. No one expects you to bounce right back, and you shouldn’t expect that of yourself either.
Don’t give out personal information. The person you’re talking to might be great, but there is also the potential for ‘catfishing’ and danger in the online dating scene. As we said, be wary. Protect yourself from danger, and if something feels off— honor your instincts. When you go out with someone for the first time, have an escape route, make sure someone knows where you’re going and who with. Protect. Yourself.
The Do’s
Do be open to the possibility. So many people write off online dating because they think it seems hokey. But, think about it, how bashful do you feel when trying to approach someone for the first time? It’s pretty freaky sometimes, and some people developing some serious anxiety about it. Online dating kind of circumvents that whole issue for some people and let’s them truly open up. But, as always, be wary and smart when you meet someone for the first time.
Do talk about the things that make you happy and the activities you enjoy. This is the time for you to explore yourself through dating. Find what makes you happy, expose yourself to new opportunities, and have some fun with it.
Do post recent photos. Don’t choose your favorite high school yearbook photo, or a cropped photo of you and your ex. Take a new one, be open, be honest, be you. This is your shot to be unapologetically yourself and have some fun.