If you’ve been cheated on by your spouse, you’re probably wondering what drove them there. There is no proper excuse for your spouse cheating, but it’s likely that they had plenty. So we’re going to break it down for you. Following you will find a list of reasons as to why spouses cheat. As we’ve said, there is no real excuse for them doing so. But, part of coming to terms with what they’ve done— is understanding why, in their eyes, they’re doing it. Please keep in mind that we are not justifying their actions, merely putting into words some of the most common excuses as to why.

Why Spouses Cheat: The Most Common Excuses

They don’t feel sexually desired

If your spouse does not heeled desired, it is not uncommon that they will search for this feeling elsewhere. Self-esteem is one of the largest underlying reasons that people will cheat. Maybe you’re both going through a tough time. Whether that’s due to job loss, or something else— maybe lust has fallen onto the back burner. This happens from time to time with a relationship— and everyone responds in a different way. Some, seek counseling, or work it out together. Others, might seek solace in a stranger.

They feel as if they’re missing out

Maybe you got married young— before you both had a chance to fully explore your sexuality and what you enjoy. So, your spouse took those feelings, and acted them out with someone else. Especially later in life, that idea of having missed out on something can be haunting for some. While many find fulfillment in a long and prosperous marriage, others might be willing to risk it in an attempt to fulfill a fantasy.

They might feel a need to retaliate

If your spouse is feeling angry over something you’ve done, they might feel as if cheating is a proper way to retaliate against you. Obviously, being spiteful is not a proper way to handle emotions or to make yourself feel better. But, this is not uncommon for many. When you’re angry, you often don’t think straight. In doing so, maybe this was the route they chose to take.

Ultimately, there is no excuse for cheating

No matter what the reason they give you— there is no real excuse for why spouses cheat. You made an agreement, together, to honor each other. So, if they’re cheating— you don’t have to let them justify it. You’re entitled to feel however you might feel, and if it comes down to it— representation is available to you. We wish you luck as you navigate this trying time in your life.