Divorce is quite common in our day and age. Because of this, almost every single person reading this will be touched by divorce in some way. Whether you’ve gone through it yourself, or someone close to you— it’s important to be there for the people in your life who are facing such a tough time. When it comes to offering support to divorcing friends, there are plenty of ways to do so. But, no matter what approach you take, it’s important that you do something. A divorce is difficult enough without a strong support system behind you…
Divorcing Friends: How to Offer Support
Invite Your Friend for Lunch, Dinner, Coffee, etc.
One of the most difficult aspects of a divorce is adjusting to all of that newfound free time. To many, that free time can become quite lonely… That’s where you come in. Understand that your friend might not be the one to come to you and say ‘keep me company’. Your friends don’t want to seem needy, even though they’re not being at all. So, go to them yourself. Invite them for coffee, dinner, a movie night; whatever they need. You know your friend better than we do. The key is just being there.
Help in the Moving Process
Packing up your life and moving into that new phase can be extremely challenging for your divorcing friends. For a lot of people, that phase also includes physically moving. So, help them pack boxes, make it fun. Bring snacks, good music, or even wine. The key is to not let them go through this alone. Invite a bunch of your friends over, make it lighthearted, and help them move past this difficult moment in time. While they do physically need extra hands to get it all done, they need your support more than anything.
Give An Extra Hand With The Kids
Especially if your friend has children, this adjustment can be quite a whirlwind. So, offer extra hands! They need a babysitter, someone to pick the kids up from soccer practice, or even just someone to occupy them while the kids are with Mom/Dad. Your friend needs a moment to catch their breath, so offer an extra hand when you have it. Above all else, this might be where your help is most needed
Supporting Their New Life
Your friend is in a new phase of life, and they’re having to rediscover things about themselves— and find new hobbies as well. Support them! Unless the behavior is damaging to them, don’t put them down! Just because they change their hair, go out every now and then, or start going on dates, doesn’t mean they’re crying for help. Rather, it just means that they’re figuring themselves out once again. Keep in contact with your friend, be accepting of the changes they make, and stay involved. Unless it’s a damaging behavior, there’s no reason to rain on their parade. Offer support, excitement, and be there for them.
When you have divorcing friends, you have to be understanding of their position. Maybe you can relate, or maybe you can’t. Either way, the key is to carry on as usual but just offer a bit more emotional and physical support. Many friends tend to back of in times that they can’t relate to. You see this when certain friends have a baby, get married, get divorced, or face death. Some people don’t know how to react during tough times and they’ll distance themselves. We’re here to tell you not to be that friend. While it’s easier on you, it’s undeniably more difficult on those who need you.