When it comes to affairs, finding the courage to tell your spouse is hard to do. But what if you never find it– do you really have to tell them you cheated? Here’s a few ways you can talk yourself out of confessing infidelity when you really should.
Confessing Infidelity: Should I Tell My Spouse?
What They Don’t Know Won’t Hurt Them
In some cases, spouses aren’t suspicious of any cheating. When that is the case, it can be hard to fess up. You feel like what you need tell them will come as a total surprise and that shock will only make things worse. So if they don’t have any clue or suspicion that you’ve been unfaithful, why tell them?
In truth, most partners suspect cheating long before they admit it to themselves or to you. So just because they’ve never accused you of it before, doesn’t mean they don’t question your loyalty. In addition. confessing infidelity even when your partner knows nothing about it can be a great start to re-building trust. For the most part, these things have a way of coming out. If your spouse finds out in some way other than from you– they will probably consider it a sign they can never trust you again.
It Will Destroy My Family
One main concern that can keep you from confessing infidelity is that doing so will destroy your family. You’re probably thinking that odds are, your spouse will decide to leave when they learn of your cheating. In that case, they may decide to take your kids, if you share children together. The decision to tell your spouse can disrupt your whole life and cause the destruction of your marriage and family.
But that may be a decision you must face. In truth, your spouse not only deserves to know but they withhold the right to end things. They need to know what took place in your marriage and then be able to decide stay or go.
It Will Never Happen Again
Another way to talk yourself out of confessing infidelity is because you believe it will never happen again. Maybe you chalk it up on to a one-time mistakes. Or perhaps you’ve learned your lesson and you will never let it happen again. Either way, it’s over and won’t be a future problem so why confess it now?
While you may never think you’ll cheat again, odds are, you probably didn’t think you’d cheat this time. So it can be easy to slip up and make a huge, hurtful mistake. In addition, your unfaithfulness could come from much bigger issues in yourself and in your marriage. If you want to deal with in order to save your relationship and prevent this happening again, it may be time to fess up.
In short, confessing infidelity can be one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. But as contradictory as it may sound, it may be what can save your marriage. In addition, sharing this with your partner is only the fair and right thing to do. You don’t want to build the rest of your relationship off of an assumption that both of you have been faithful. When cheating on someone, it’s important they know the truth and have the freedom to decide.